I found one love and I lost one love on the very same day.
After being a divorcee for 8 years+ I finally tied the knots with my husband Sun.
Sun and I got together barely for 1 year + before he proposed to me.
We both were childhood soulmate back then at the age of 13(me)/14 (him).
We never got together until last year.
Papa had a very good impression of Sun and he knew Sun is the one for me.
Papa told us to get married after we got together for just 3 months! We were taken aback and was a little annoyed by his anxiety. Early January 16, papa voiced to me again, " you and Sun should get married..". Me being wasn't sure if Sun was ready reacted in a very nasty way. I responded, " aiyo,,, pa! can you don't stress Sun? Give us sometime. I don't want to scare him off from this relationship!" I got pissed and walked off. ( Now I thought I shouldn't throw tantrum on him :( ).
I stormed to the room and complained to Sun. Sun just smiled and kept quiet.
Few days later, off we went for our vacation aka birthday trip for me! We had a wonderful time in Bali, despite the scorching hot weather. There,, he went down on his knees, asked if I would be his wife. I said, Yes!
I sent the picture of my proposal ring to my papa and he wasn't sure what that's all about. He wouldn't think that was a proposal since I was so hostile few days back when he expressed his wish for us to get hitched. Few days later when I resumed to Singapore I called him. I asked, " Pa, why didn't you congratulate me?". His respond was, " aha? why ya? I giggled," hehe... I am getting married!". I guess he was astonished but tried his best to remain calm and said," oh! good ar! good ar!" and speechless after that.
My mama then told me that my papa was smiling all the way after hearing this good news. He told my mama, this will be his last wish. He said, "Ahh Yen very stubborn, don't know when will she listen up and get married. Ha, finally, I can stop worrying about her now. Sun is a good man, she will be in good hands."
A month before our wedding, papa had agreed to be my witness and he will walk me down the aisle and to hand-over his beloved youngest daughter to Sun. He has never done this before and equally excited about everything. He said," never done the Ang Moh style before.." He even asked which blazer should he wear, which shirt to pair with.
However, two weeks passed and his cancer attack were vigorous. He couldn't walk over night! He was on wheel chair. We were devastated. Papa apologized and told me to get someone else to be my witness for my solemnization. I refused. I trusted he would recover by then. As days went by, I knew I had very slim chance to have him to walk me down the aisle. I told papa, " No worries pa, so long you are there sitting in the venue watching me and Sun exchange our vows, I am happy enough."
Papa told me that he has no confident but he will tried. He expressed the pain that he's suffering. It is unlikely for him to travel in a car for 2 hours from Kluang to Singapore. I was a little angry back then. But later on, I've accepted the fact that my dad can't travel by road for that long. That time, I realized all I wanted was just for him to recover. I can get my brother in law to be my witness and I could get my mummy to walk me in.
Few days later, his condition got worse. The morphine was not helping at all. We increased the intake per instructed by the doctor but it caused even more harm than good to my papa.
He couldn't speak anymore. He couldn't move. He could only nod his head or answered "umm", "bu- you (don't want ; in Chinese). He is 100% bedridden. He mourned and battled on his own. One night, I dozed off and I jumped up suddenly after 1 hour and found my dad dragged himself to the side of the bed, mourning in great pain. My heart broken into pieces! I cried out and I don't know how to ease his pain.
I got Sun to help me, carried papa back slowly to his bed, and put him to sleep. Two hours later, papa woke up, and he wet his pants. He didn't respond but helplessly gazing at me. I controlled my tears and gave him a pat. I told him, " it's ok papa, small matter ya. I will clean you up and put on your diaper for you." I could see his eyes tearing, but I controlled myself not to tear even more.
1 week before my wedding, he suddenly went into coma. We hurried him to the hospital and doctor did all sort of scan and check-up on him. We were all numbed and scared. Papa must wake up! Me, Sun and my eldest sister's family stayed with papa the whole night. In the morning, he struggled a little to open his eyes. Still, he was in a semi-conscious stage. He couldn't drink or swallow anymore, he had to rely on tube feeding. His condition was very unstable. We took turns to take care on him 24 hours. It was really heartbreaking to see him suffering. We continued to speak to him, we encouraged him, he acknowledged and nodded to us that he wanted to recover, he will not give up. One morning, the doctor came and sent papa for CT Brain scan as we notified the doctor our suspect of papa having a stroke. True enough, papa has multiple stroke on his left brain.
It was then 3 days before our wedding. To be frank no one was in the mood for the wedding. That included myself. But I told myself, I have to be fair to my man, my husband to be back then.
I pulled myself up and did all the necessary prep together with Sun. We didn't intend to have pre-wedding shot. However, 2 days before our wedding I told Sun, " papa and mama always wanted us to have a wedding photo, shall we take 1 for them?" Without further consideration, Sun supported the idea. We developed 2 gorgeous 8R wedding photos. One for our wedding reception. One for papa. I told Sun right after the wedding I will make a trip to JB Hospital. I wanted to present this wedding photo to papa. He will definitely be delighted. I wanted to show papa our wedding videos too. Again Sun was very supportive, he said, "Ok".
In the meantime, we have been calling in to JB to check with my 5th and 2nd sis the condition of my papa. They told us there were signs he's getting better. Alas! we relieved a little and praying silently that his condition will get better as time goes by.
On 4th March 16, mama and my eldest sister & family made their way to Singapore. Sis arranged to bring mama to see papa before they leave for Singapore. Mama told papa she's coming to Singapore to witness my wedding with Sun. Mama told papa, "your wish has came true", and he smiled.
They left JB hospital and adjourn to Singapore at 12 noon.
After an hour, my family arrived.
Everyone was tired and worried about my papa.
We had a mini gathering (BBQ) as a pre-wedding celebration. As we ate, we wondered how's papa. We called to our 5th & 2nd sis who were there to take care of papa, they told us papa looked better now.
We felt slightly more peaceful after hearing that.
Finally here came 5th March 16, me and Sun got so excited. But deep inside, I felt something was missing. I guess I missed papa's presence. My make-up artist came at 615am and we started the dolling session since then. At 730am, I received a call from my 5th bro in law, he asked for my eldest sister. I asked why but he shunt my question and hurried me to past the phone to sis.
After that nothing happened. Everything seems normal.
At 1040am as we were hurrying to One degree 15 Marina ; our wedding venue, my eldest bro-in law called to ask for his wife. So I told him to call another number as she wasn't with me in the same car. Again, everything was normal.
11am, finally our Wedding started. My mama walked me down the aisle, handed me to Sun and told him to take good care of me. The entire wedding was fabulous. I was happier than I expected. My guests were all my VVIPs. I didn't want a big crowd, as I wanted to keep it exclusive; only my immediate family and my super close buddies to be presented there on this special day. That's the whole idea.
My bro-in-law told me that they have to leave by 12 noon as the driver would not be free to pick them up at later hour. I thought so and I told my mama, " ok, later I will go over to JB hospital to see papa ya". She said, " ok!"
So I continued to stay around and took lotsa photos with my buddies, and with Sun.
Everyone stayed till 2.30pm. We dismissed with lotsa joy and laughter.
Sun sent me home together with my god brother Win.
When we were on the way home again i reminded him, " later I will go to JB ya. You can stay back here to take care of you mum and sis since they came all the way from KL,". He didn't say much. He only said, " go back, you take a hot shower first, then you take a nap ya".
When I got home, Sun prepared a set of pyjamas for me. He reminded me again after shower, take a nap. I nodded.
As I showered, I was smiling. I thought to myself, " finally I married the man i love and the man that loves me so much, finally!".
As I stepped out from my shower room I saw an incoming whatsapp message from Amy (my niece):
" Gonggong passed away this morning. Mummy said you must come back today!"
I broke down immediately, I screamed and cried my lungs out and I dashed out of my room.
As I shivered, I said to Sun," papa left us, papa left!". He hugged me and said nothing.
I pushed him back and asked, " you mean you knew earlier?".
I can't remember how long i cried after that.
He tried to calm me down and explained that he was about to break the news to me after i showered but Amy was one step faster than him.
He explained he couldn't bear to see me grieve when I was in my joyous moment (at the wedding).
I was then told papa must have rushed his spirit to be there with us witnessing our wedding.
He passed on at 9:26am, and our wedding starts at 10:30am. He did keep his promise.
He knew he couldn't physically there to witness our wedding but he made it in his spirit.
His last wish has finally been fulfilled.
He must have been enduring till my wedding day ..before he left for another world.
Indeed 5th March 16 is my happiest day ever yet to be my saddest day ever...
